Get on point.

Right now that's one of my main priorities. i'm almost 17 and i need to become more independent and start doing things all on my own. Not that it's that hard or that i'm not pretty much use to it already. What i'm REALLY talking about is that i need to start supporting myself financially. I wish there was something easy i could do to make a little money on the side until i turn 18 but up until now i still haven't found anything. I don't want to get a job right at this moment because like i explained before i'm don't really have the time for it and there are a few obstacles that are preventing me from getting one. (Dad) So i have to kinda plan around "them" until then. Easier said than done.

I also have to get a few checkups done before i'm of age. Since my stupid father has never cared about me or my health now seems to be the time to take advantage of the insurance and get everything i need to get done, done.

Thinking back on all the bull crap i have had to put up with i'm glad that i'm turning 18 next year. That way my dad won't be able to claim me anymore on his income tax. The money that i have never even seen or recieved from him ever won't be going to him anymore. Good luck on getting a thousand dollars less every year for the rest of your life! Maybe then he'll choose to spend his money wisely instead of giving it to his good for nothing children who are working, married adults. No, i'm not included.

Which brings me to another point. How do you think you look being a 30 year old, married with one child and still recieving money from your father. On top of that you don't even care about him at all. Okay i understand that he is sick but he's not even THAT sick. He was still asking for money even BEFORE he got sick. Same goes for his other "daughter" ..or maybe i should say only daughter because i'm not considered to be his daughter. She also has a child, a job (she isn't sick mind you), and a freaking boyfriend. If she can afford a brand new car do you really need your dad to support you? Enough said.

Anyways, another way for me to get on point is to establish wether or not i want to keep a couple friends or not. I've already established what there role is in my life (if any) which is something i need to think long and hard about. I've known them for so long, but if the relationship isn't valued is it really worth the trouble? Should i say something to them about it? Maybe confront them or something or should i just keep things to myself and make the decision on my own?

Hmm, decisions decisions.

I'm not really sure how i should go about things. and if that isn't enough pressure already college time is approaching very quickly and i still haven't figured out what in the hell i want to go for. What should i pick to be my major? What should i minor in? Decisions, decisions. What is a girl to do. I know that all of these decisions can only be made by me (well obviously). What i meant was that it doesn't matter what other people say or suggest to me. I'm the only one that knows what's best for me even though it might not be so clear at the moment. With all this thinking i have to do on a daily basis i'm suprised my mind hasn't already exploded into a million pieces.

..I seem to be getting sleepy. I did do a lot today so i suppose i sould get at least SOME rest. Nighty night.